Discussion of "Dirty Laundry - 2" by writerwannabe

Great tension-building. Thanks for not giving away what was written. That's a wonderful lead-in for the next masher.

I know you don't give a damn about typos, but I'll mention one anyway...since it's in draft form:

I twisted the door knob and pushed at the almost the same time and threw myself into the bathroom.

One too many words.

Thanks, al! You're right about me and grammar/typos..lol. But, I DO like to have them pointed out when I have an opportunity to fix them. I'll do that, now.

You did build excellent tension here, WWB. It was great to have it only start with the mother then have her transfer it to the husband.

You've got a great continuation here, even though I did want to know the message, it does give the next masher more room to work.

Wait a minute!!!! I'm the next masher of this story! Whoa... I get to decide the message on the towel.

(Insert evil laugh here)

LOL...or not!

I agree with the others - great tension building. I absolutely loved that you didn't reveal what was written on the towel.

The voice of the character was a little off, a little different than the previous chapter. But then, it worked well with the pacing of the chapter. I wouldn't be myself or sound like myself if someone I loved suddenly went missing. At first, I thought this would be a point against you - so to speak. But now that I've read it again, I like the change. :D

Thanks, JD. Following a woman writing POV of a woman is pretty danged hard for me...and, too, the woman I'm following is shadinah!!!! lol...need I say more?

Ahhh! I don't care what every one else is saying, I freakin' want to know what was on the damn towel! Grrr! ;)

Loved: "I felt his smug grin burning into my back." That whole scene, totally picture my own husband and myself, I'd panic and take action, he'd be left wondering what the hell I was doing! lol To funny WWB. I think you kept it in perfect harmony with the first one. Brillantly done!

Thank you, dkk...;o). Maybe Djinn will let us all know what was on the towel....and, then again...maybe not...lol

dude...you just get better and better. really good read!

Nice read WW! I like the tension building and great way to leave us hanging on the towel thing. Although if Addie and Ron have been together for 25 years I don't know how because she strikes me as no-nonsense and tough and Ron's a bit of a flake. The woman in me likes that of course!! =)

goodness - this could totally be my husband and I in 20 years or so...

Late reader, but here I am. Loved this continuation - the desperate grasping for a logical, rational explanation, hating the husband for being the one to introduce said explanation, the chewed fingernail, and of course the cliffhanger! I can't help but wonder if the other kids are being woken by the screaming? Meh. More important is the unknown message... which I guess I get to see in the next chapter :)

Good stuff! I am so excited to see this storyline continued.