Discussion of "Love's Sin" by timiee

You asked for constructive criticism and so here is some, though granted I am not a professional. To me, (and I'm sure many people would agree), When it comes to adjectives less is more, in most cases. The possible exception being that you want to bring more attention to a particular noun than the rest of the nouns. If knowing that the oak door is massive and ancient and has peculiar scrollwork is important to the plot of the story then sure use all of those descriptions, but if in the story it is "just a door" then less is more. Look at your chapter again. What action is taking place? You look out the window at the snow, you see a movement, you head downstairs and outside into the snow to check it out, you meet a man, you have a conversation.
In my opinion you could make this chapter have as long but twice as effective. Remember, if it is not moving your plot forward, it is weighing it down. Oh and by the way, I think this story as far as "story" goes is a wonderful start, you made me care about the main character, and you made me curious about the strange trench-coat wearing man. I would love to read more.