Discussion of "Harvest" by theeighthvowel

WOW! I'm intrigued, please more!more! I gave you a 4! Read my work and tell me what you think.......

Intriguing, and really descriptive! This is a great piece.

Whoa really good starter. suspensful and it gets the imagination rolling. great job.

Good Start! I wonder what next?

Cool - I like stories about wells. This one is intriguing and there is a sinister element to the child's behavior that begs for a continuation.

Cool start....you've got my attention, that's for sure....what's next?

I like how it was left open for anything to happen. I like how everyone inferred that she was a child. However, I remember polka dots on my grandmother. And overalls on my college roommate, so I found this person rather ageless. The bare feet and strong hands brought to mind a worker, a laborer - a farmhand maybe?

I think it's the hair that makes us think child. Undone and a tangled sheet. We tend to think that only little girls care so little about their hair, although this could easily be an adult woman.

I actually pictured Maybel as ‘Baby Firefly’ from ‘House of a Thousand Corpses’ and ‘the Devils Rejects.’ (Sherri Moon Zombie)
I thought this chapter was effectively creepy. The little details without question make it a terrific MASH chapter.
I did think it was however painfully short. The quick stabbing sentences created a choppy mood that while I enjoyed, I’m skeptical of how it might work for an entire read. It reminds me of one of those abridged blurbs you read on the back pages of a cheap paperback horror novel. Which isn’t to say I didn’t love it…believe me, I’ve read plenty of cheap Horror novels based on those blurbs.
I am curious to see how this develops from a storyline perspective and how other writers handle the style.

Sorry i don't know what all the gushing is about. It was a good first 12 lines and has lots to offer the continuation but I cant get to excited about some one throwing a dead animal into a working well on top of ... somebody ... a worker, a captive, she knew he was there, the writer has always imagined what it would be like to throw an animal in the well. The girl is lazy and she doesn't want to bury the dog?? I mean folks really, there isn't enough there.

Whats makes u so sure its a man in the well rigid? Why not a girl or even some other sort of creature not yet discussed? a changeling perhaps.
I thought it was fantstically open ended and therefore ripe for many different interpretations.
I gave it a 5.

I agree that the choppy sentences were a little distracting as I had to reread them a couple of times just to get the flow. I thought the descriptiveness of piece was good and the style of the writing seemed to play well with seemingly rural feel of the piece. A lot of questions about the identity of the character. This is great for next chapter writers. Personally, I pictured the unkempt person as an older grandmother type myself. Like the old lady on the block with all the cats. i.e. reclusive Bette Davis in Hush Hush Sweet Charlotte

Choppy sentenced and vague wording. Not even very imaginative. The ONLY part I like was the discription of the girl, good effect. She seems alittle deranged. The story needs to be expanded and more elaborate. It seems like some deep dark voice should be readin it as a prelude to some B horror flick.