Discussion of "Dirty Laundry" by shadinah

This was really good. Do you have a 2nd chpt in the works?

I liked this a lot. It was very descriptive and I can just see that mom staring into that hamper. Can't wait to read more.

Wow - thanks. The idea popped into my head as I was doing laundry (surprise, surprise...) I have the start of a chapter two in my head, but really need to nail down which direction I want to take.

Awesome stuff! I love the suspense throughout this passage - wondering, what on earth did she find in the laundry? It was also a remarkably graceful way to introduce an entire cast of characters and give us a good idea of what they were like. For instance, the comment about doubting the husband even knew where the laundry hamper was - ha! Well done!

I am sitting here doing laundry and of course, i log in to read some stuff and your story is the feature...it was great and as I sit here and do laundry, I cannot help but laugh! :-)

nice story! descriptive and fun!

but i must admit im totally lost

wondering what will happen next

After reading your bio I had to read something else you'd written, and I was right, you are good at description. You evoked definite emotion with the suspense of letting us know what was in the hamper.

A greatly created suspense, and not to forget- A very nice storyline. You skillfully provided all details of the family yet the reader ouldn't get bored.

A perfect story to mash!

i like ur writing. y is d shirt bloody?

Hi shadinah ~ terrific little gripper here. you obviously have a gift. creative, suspenseful, and well written. It’s just a personal issue for me…to see something well written yet so almost painfully short. Selfishly, I wanted more. But I see you have a chapter two…so hopefully that will satisfy my dirty laundry craving.
I really liked this line:
“My stubborn, iron-willed little man, who was sure he was Spiderman?”

Spectacular! I don't know how I missed this but I
Can't wait to read on.