have enough guts to tell your partner what you like in bed and you will be happier in the long run! just settling for an orgasm and you selling your pleasure short. just telling your partner that your fine with your sex life is a lie.  most of us(especially women...but also men with low self esteem) are very afraid to express themselves.  we all have fantasies and to not live them is a shame.  dont let childhood upbringings or other emotional shame prevent you from havibg the kind of sex you have always desired.  if nothing else you will get respect from your mate by opening up and putting yourself up for possible rejection.