John joined the line and waited for the usher to walk away.  There were good amount of people in the room but considering the fact that this funeral was for a younger person, it wasn't all that crowded.  John made note of this.  He looked over his shoulder before whispering to Paul, "So what happened?  This guy OD or something?" Paul looked straight ahead while whispering, "Sort of".  John whispered even louder. "How can you sort of OD?"  Paul looked down at his shoes.  He bent down and rubbed a scuff out of his left shoe.  He bent back up and whispered to John "He snorted cement mix."  John's eyebrows stood straight up, "I'm sorry?”  Paul explained, "He thought he bought heroin, but this guy gave him cement mix instead.  When he tried to snort it, it went up into his brain and hardened.  He died on the spot."  

 

Before he could digest this calamitous revelation, John realized that it was his turn to view the body.  He kept his eyes focused on the cross in the deceased's hands.   He knelt down, made the sign of the cross, and pretended to say some prayers.  Um I'm sorry that you died...I hope your somewhere better now...Oh that's real good...he's probably in heaven right now looking at you wondering why your sitting here right now, and wishing you would get away from his casket...I should say a prayer..Ahh but I don't even believe in any of that stuff... I wonder if that would jinx him or something...I wonder what his face looks like...No don't look...Just wrap this up and get out of here...   

 

He stole a glance at the face and quickly fixed his eyes back on the cross.  He took another look, this time for a couple seconds.  It was an ungodly sight.  The poor kid was wearing an expression that only a person whose last thoughts were "Holy ****!  I just snorted cement mix instead of heroin, could match.  He quickly took his eyes off the kid's face.  

 

Something came over John.  He bit his tongue.  No. No. No. This is not funny at all.  This kid is dead here.  Nothing funny whatsoever.   John stole one last glance at the corpse.  He lost it.  Kkmmpphhfftt!  His shoulders began shaking as he made his best attempts to stifle his laugh with his fist.  He got up, blessed himself, and swiftly walked out of the room.

 

Seconds later he was greeted by Paul in the lobby.  "Yo, what the hell was that about?"  John just stood there biting his knuckle, "I don't know man.  I just saw his face and lost it". Didn't you see his face?”  Paul shot him an incredulous look.  "I never look at the face.  It creeps me out.  That dude is probably gonna haunt you bro.  I would haunt the **** out of you if you came to my viewing and laughed at my corpse."

 

"I'll make a mental note.  Did anyone see it?"

 Paul hesitated.  "Na I don't think so, you're cool"  

 

Just then John's mother came walking up, wearing a facial expression that only a mother, who just witnessed her son laughing at a viewing could match.

 

"John Michael Ferguson, I know I did not just see you, kneeling next to that poor boy and laughing at him!  Are you sick?  Are you mentally ill?  Please tell me that you are on drugs or something.  Please tell me something other than that I have raised a child who laughs while kneeling next to dead bodies.  I was right next to his mother!"

 

A wave of guilt crashed over John.  He really felt like ****. 

“Mom...I don't know what happened.  I-I heard about what happened to him then I saw his face and it looked all weird and something just happened in me, like a reaction or something  I'm sorry.  

 

His mom was standing there with her arms crossed, her facial expression frozen in a look of cold fury.  "Oh, you’re sorry?  Oh ok great then.  I'll just go tell that boy's mother that you’re sorry.  John, I was standing right next to her.  She tried to say something else but stammered as if a million things were trying to come out at once but got stuck behind her teeth.

 

What, do you think I feel good about laughing?   I feel terrible, but I couldn't control it, mom.  I had just heard about him snorting the cement and then next thing I know I was standing there looking at him and I felt so weird looking at his face that my body didn't know what to do, so I just laughed.  I don't know how else to put it.

 

John's mother's face wrinkled up like raisin, “Cement mix?  What the hell are you talking about? 

 

Paul looked sheepish.  Uh my bad, man.  I was just messing with you. 

 

Dude, are you serious?  Why would you tell me that? "

 

I don't know; I was just messing around.  

 

"You both should be ashamed of yourselves.  I had to tell that boy's mother that you had tourettes."  

 

"I'm sorry mom.  What did he die from?"

 

I don't know, John.  I think he was inhaling gasoline fumes or something.  

 

He was huffing gas?

 

Paul cracked a little laugh, which soon spread to John.  He bit his tongue so hard that he could taste blood.  

 

"Oh real nice, you are a smacked **** John.  I am ashamed to even call you my son."

 

Laughing, John said, Mom I'm sorry, but if you’re dumb enough to be doing something like that... 

 

"Some people aren't lucky enough....

 

She cut herself off as a man walked by.  "I'm not even going to waste my breath.  Paul, go away." 

 

"Sorry Aunt Becky" 

Paul skipped out without any hesitation.  

 

"Look sweetie, I really want you to see a doctor.  You've been so different lately and I just think...

 

"I am not seeing a shrink mom.  I'm fine"

 

"I am not asking you John, I am telling you.  It's the least you can do for embarrassing me in there like that.  She opened her purse and rummaged through.  "Here, call and make an appointment"

 

"Oh that's great.  You carry cards around and advertise for this guy.  Why don't you just wear a big sign and stand by the highway and tell everyone that you’re crazy?"

 

"I'm not the one who laughs at funerals."  She stuffed the card in his hand and walked away.