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Discussion of "Midnite Raine Chapter 2" by midnite_raine_Sira


1 crystalfoo 5 years, 1 month ago Reply

I see you've still got this posted as a draft...It's always good to come back to something later with a fresh mind. :) I like the story! You've created a nice juxtapostion with the girls character (she's tough and cool but there's a soft, needy side to her) and this cool, foriegn (i'm assuming) boy. Just as a thought: if you italicize your main charcter's internal thoughts, it makes the connection between reader and character more personal. plus it looks cool. lol. You are doing great! I'll re-read when you edit and post. Check out the line of killer chapters we are doing (it's the one with Meanwhile, Back In Tampa in it.) Start with the first one "Searching" and follow thru...it's ROCKIN'! I just added another chapter. Some of the best writers on this site (Shadow, Honey, Dog,) are working on this along with myself. It's too cool. TTYL. Great Job, again!


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1 midnite_raine_Sira 5 years, 1 month ago Reply

Thank you Thank you. Lol you know i have been thinking- that i should use the italics on her thoughts, but for some reason i never even think about it when im typing it, then im lie OH! Lol you'll learn once you meet me that im a very spazzy person. Haha and I'll check it out soon, im dieing to mash but i have to finish Midnite Raine by next week or im going to burst! so I'll finish it soon and get some mashing done. it's killing me that i can't i'd just get to confused.


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1 artemis19 5 years ago Reply

Hey there, sira. I’ve read your work – the two chapters of midnite raine, the vampire story, and the draft ‘a nameless lover. I think I’d be able to write a chapter on ‘a nameless lover’-that is, if you publish it. =) I’ve noticed recurring patterns on your stories, which I might add had me devouring each realistic scene. First is the subject of being different, portrayed by ‘sira’ in midnite raine. That and the conflict with people around her because she is different. Second is the longing to find someone who will understand and see her past her ‘different-ness’. Of course when we envision such persons, we want them to be beautiful, I think because it reflects our desire to find the inner self of that person to be beautiful as well, the kind of person we can entrust our hurts and faults and imperfect selves without fear of being used, manipulated, or the like. Forgive me for asking, but are those two patterns really in your life? Your writing expresses these things so realistically I can almost touch their rawness. The other things are 1. vampires. Have you been reading a good book about them? Sometimes I read fiction books about subjects I like that the fantasy gets in my blood (like being a secret agent-that’s a secret ok?=) 2. Japan. I can’t figure out if this is really a part of your life, or just a vicarious experience. I’d bet on the former. 3. cars 4. linkin park 5. male companionship/friendship.
I know this looks like an essay, but I thought maybe we could help out each other, being a sort of newbie myself (I’ve just joined Storymash last March), and learn through our writing. Actually I’m curious about what kind of person you are-reading someone’s writing can do that. Again forgive me, but I have a psychologist-side that I seldom express. Goodluck on us both!


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1 midnite_raine_Sira 5 years ago Reply

Hey thank you so much you don't know how happy your comment made me, im still uneasy about my work, and i am going to publish 'a nameless lover' its just i had typed a lot and something happened to it and i haven't had a chance to rewrite it all and publish it. And i was going for realistic while at the same time a fantisy, like stephenie meyer's work (shes the one who inspireded the writer in me the most). Ad you know your right about some nof Sira's characteristics, i am one of the 'weird' people at my school, but im not disliked to the point Sira is, the characters tast in music and cars, are mine to most of the songs i talk about through out the story were the songs i were listening to at the time, and Sira's car the Aston is the exact car i would love to own but i highly doubt that will ever happen. and her wanting to love someone and to have some one love her is the mood i have been in for the last months (thats a bit emarising to say) And for years now i have been in love with Japan i live here in the USA but i have been dying lately to go there, which i might do before i go to collage.
Thats funnyish in my opion you and i both joind in the same month, and really i dont completly know what kind of person i am. HA the thing is i don't know where the stories come from the just come. See midnite raine is actually a novle i just finished writing and it came to me when i was just goofing around at my dads work writing another story, and now i am curently writing a new story called the untouchables and i plain on trying to publish them both(but not story mash publishing.
I hope you do mash on to my other stories it would be great, that's part of why i joined i wanted to see where my stories are taken. And i hope to read more of your work to.


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