Well,that should deter him I thought gaily, reving my engine the wrong way down a one way road while fumbling to find my cell phone in the  pocket in this giganormous frock.

I glanced into the review mirror and Jesus son of God, there he was, cracked windshield and all, a weird toothy grin on his face that oddly made me think of a friend of mine.

O'kay, well more than a friend, you know, the kind "with benefits."

Odder still, he was the reason I was fumbling for my phone. All this adreneline had to be used up in a constuctive way, right? 

I glance  into the rearview once more as I press the speed dial on my phone. Is he mocking me with his phone also up to ear? Damn!

My party picks up. "Hey Charlie, guess what, your not the only tree hugging freak in town", I cheerfully inform. 

Just then I see the car coming at me,going the right way down a one way road.