I love Silverstein! The imagery you use is extraordinary!

If only it would let me submit more stories than it is letting me per day. I still have several chapters too type up in my vampire story, which is the one I need the most help with because I'm horribly stuck in it.

Wow. That's great! It really touched me cuase I'm a sucker for blue eyes. :p

It's like walking into a time warp into old day suburbia! :D I love the context, but it needs some more of your vivid description like your other chapters.

Joe is the main character. It was just a starter that I got stuck on, I was hoping someone might be able t owork off of it. Joe is the girl.

I love the intensity, it really draws you into the story. That's what most writing lacks-so keep that up.
A critique I can give is that you should develop the scene a little more, describe the fear in Eddie's eyes and the shift of good to evil in Crusader/Wrath. I look forward to seeing future chapters, and I may even think of one my own.

I love the vivid scenary! It really brings the picture to one's mind. That's most of writing, being able to describe it so everyone can see it the way you do-leaving just enough room to let their own imagination to work in its own oddities without ruining the picture. I love it.

Let me give you a bit of trivia to the story, just to make it a little more fun:
1. All of the characters names have 7 letters in them. Even Meghann's dog! The guy Cameron was based off of first name had 7 letters (as his name was indeed Cameron) and his last name had 7 letters, so I decided to make everyone have 7 letter names.
2. Most of the chapters are named after three doors down songs, as they just seemed to fit. One of the chapters is named after an Audioslave song, because it was perfect.
3. I've been working on this story for years, only recently having written the prolouge to combat with the origin of the Twilight series so if some of it sounds like a middle schooler writing it, that's because it was.

:D Great writing, keep it up. It pulls you in, I just wish there was more!

It's got a great plotline! :D I enjoy reading future chapters, may write one of my own. However, the spacing and font seems to be messed up a bit, as it seems jumbled together.
I love your writing style, though the spacing and punctuation confuse the story a little.