The story so far:
Disturbance might function as a measure of stability or solidity.
If you consider an ant colony for instance, there seems to be some empirical truth to the concept that the strength of the colony might be gauged by their reactions after you topple the hill. It's a gross oversimplification, but it is one that seems to abound.
Now consider watching a website. Imagine a very small one. Say one with fewer than two hundred regular visitor each month. There are backlinks and key words. There are servers and connections. The site and the colony didn't seem that dissimilar to me.
A larger site simply seemed like a larger colony, but I'm jumping far ahead.
I've mentioned my content. You might wonder why I'm know intimating such darkness. Because it was my email, and I know that She did not simply stop sending Me messages!
We all accept the security of such services. Email has become as trusted as post mail once was. But then our connection, hers and my own, was as stable as rock. It simply was there. That's how I knew that after a week of not receiving a message that someone was blocking out messages. And I knew that as time went on She would begin to think I was not sending messages to Her, if my messages were being blocked too.
I tried posting to sites that I thought She might visit. I even hacked one of the sites I knew she frequented. I posted in large simple font, "I am still sending messages. I miss You!" and I signed the handle that I had used in our previous correspondence.
It isn't an everyday thing when everything is leveled. I didn't know what to do. I'm not even certain how to expain the spiral that transpired. Have You watched "V"?
That email service is long defunct. If I can't have what I know She was sending Me then neither can any of the others that were in that hill with Us! That hill is gone.
I've touched a number of other hills. It's like knocking on a door, only I knock hard when the answer doesn't come...