Discussion of "Inside on Turner Street - Chapter 2" by hebe6405

Leaving it in draft form...

I had to slightly change the POV from the first chapter, but I think I kept the same "voice." Let me know what you think and if any changes are necessary (either here or over email...)

Great transition hook for the next writer. Good job developing a new character--though it sounds like any future dialoge from Marjory will be minimal.

Hey, hebe...been a long time...lol. Still, I recognized you in this chapter. The character build, intertwined with detail (the show kind of detail) was expertly done.

I really liked the detail of the "mystery" wife being an artist with extreme tastes. I think that could become an excellent plot point...even if, as all indications point to, the wife is dead.

I am not lying to you when I say I admire your writing. Accept my apologies, because it has been awhile since I read your work. You are so articulate with your work, paying close attention to detail. I know another writer is up next, but I am so curious as to how you would have continued on...you left a cliffhanger that has my admiration. Fantastic work.

Awww... thanks for all the complements. I may have to come back to the challenge of how I would have continued the work.

Perfect. Intricate detail, hints of an overarching plot without revealing too much. Wonderful character development and sense of place. As usual, you have deliver the goods. Bravo!