Discussion of "The Man Holding the Red Umbrella" by greenrumor

"I see her in the distance. She's aprroaching me slowly, with her head down and trying to look sorry for what she's done and what she's about to do. I inhale sharply and force a look that says "I don't mind." Here she comes. I try to exhale as she approaches, but my lungs are temporarily broken."

Beautifully written!

Thanks! I just wrote the next chapter. Hope you like it.

This is really cool!
I wonder…
Does she only come when its raining…or does the narrator just always carry the red umbrella, rain or shine…and ‘shielding her from the rain’ is just a euphemism for hiding her from the judgmental gazes of on-lookers? (Because she’s all bruised and such) ?
There are some really intriguing questions here. Initially I was going to give it a 4…just cause its so short and I wanted more out of a first chapter…but then I forgave that because I just really, really liked it. (And I saw you had posted a chap 2)
So I gave ya a 5.
I also thought this line was fantastic:
“She's approaching me slowly, with her head down and trying to look sorry for what she's done and what she's about to do.”

Great story so far. Iam looking forward to more...Read my work, please. "Gunther", "Johnny Lame-O, etc. I gave you a 5....