Discussion of "Kung Fu" by crystalfoo

Well, that came out of nowhere. "Kung Fu" might've been funny - some quick-witted version of a 70's night club fight or something. Guess not. This just happened, and almost without thought. Yikes. Should I make a frantic call to a therapist today? Or maybe just let this settle, like the crap in the bottom of a Guiness? Yea, the latter. lol

.....and everbody was kung-fu fighting.....
Hi-Yah!
lol
Great job and very well written!

I LOVED your prose - you painted such a lush and descriptive picture, such vivid memories and impressions. And I loved the flat, blunt "No, son" at the end, too.

Thank you! I wanted it to feel like a memory, less like a chapter. Like how dreams sound when you try to describe them. Glad you liked it. ;) Certainly a bit on the morbid side, tho. lol

Good, you very much succeeded at the dream-like feel. I kept waiting to see how it was about Kung Fu, and the realization left me sickened, sympathetic for the grandmother and angry at the grandfather. What a terrible master he was to ignore the ethics of his art, and what a shame for the mother to be left only with that negative impression. I was that son once, so your story has personal meaning for me. Now if I could just learn to control my literary punches... I'm giving you the "5-finger death punch".

ahhh, niiiice. thanks synapto.
on a small note...I intended for the kung fu reference to be implied by it's content, so glad it made you sick with the realization. that was the goal. the child watching her father kick her mother is the woman in the end, wondering why she married a drummer and why her son is so inexplicably drawn to martial arts, though she nor her child have ever had real contact with her biological father. The sad truth is that this is my memory. I was the child in the playpen, I did marry a drummer (why, oh why was I always drawn to drummers?) and my son did ask me to take martial arts. Indeed, I said no. Only because the imagery of my own son, who looks so much like that man whom I have never really cared to know, practicing martial arts would flood me with disgust. On a lighter note, I had a very happy childhood after age 4. lol No need to send the white coats-I'm good. ;)

I understand. You achieved your goal very well. Thank you for sharing the truth with us. I wrote my comment with that possibility in mind, but I generally try to assume that the writer is not the narrator is not the character, etc... so you have captured my sympathy, yet I also feel for your son and wonder about his age. I learned a lot of good things from my martial arts training, despite my mother's objection. This chapter helps me better understand the perspective of the concerned mother. It is similar to the gun control debate, I think. There are bad people in the world.
If you found yourself in an alley with your son and you were facing some dangerous men...
I respect your position, though, and I still find your story moving.
*bow*

Very powerful and poetic. Read the comments too, and wow. My first impression was wondering at the memory of a two year old, thinking my own memories start at three. But, reconsidering the age, I do remember a few things from two - and an image such as yours would last a lifetime.

I can't remember a thing from that young an age. I'm mightily impressed by your mental facilities, let alone your writing prowess. This was an impressive piece that captured me and frightened me with the abrupt but muted violence. I join synapto and bow to you.

Great chapter, Crystalfoo! You wrote these memories well, evoking much emotion and interest. As a martial artist, I felt angered at the grandfather character and concerned for the family he abused. I am glad things worked out for the best.

Again, this is a great chapter. Well done.

Thanks- those memories are truly ancient and I was only trying to show that even seemingly latent, eroded, inconsequential experiences in life can have deep impact on later decisions and emotions. I would swear that there is no residue left over from those early couple of years, and yet, I've been inexplicably drawn to drummers time and again and I have strong opposition to my son taking martial arts. Go figure. Blah. On to happier things...lol

Wow Foo, that was incredible. Your descriptions were perfect, I could really feel how intensly you were/are drawn to drums. I took Tea Kwon Do for years and I'm surprised at how upset it made me that someone would use that knowledge in such a horrible way (ok, I'm starting to sound like a bad movie, but you see what I mean I hope). I'm impressed at your memory and more impressed with your re-telling of it. I loved the impassive way you told the story, it made such a potent impact. Very nicely done.

Hyyyy-ya! I absolutely am in love with this chapter Foo. I gots chills.
Sooo much heart. One of the best I personally have read in a while. Thanks!
“ And it is bitter sweet; a mix of longing, and belonging, of something more like a birthmark, like the blood that pumps in me more than the back beat of a good tune.”

Thank you, eleven. Glad you liked it-

Beautifully written! - strange how the human psyche is always somewhat drawn to the familiar from our earliest years- good or bad- I think it works as a compelling opening chapter but could stand as it is as a completed piece.