Discussion of "Taps at the Window" by ashaftergreen

This chapter leaves a lot of space to maneuver for anyone thinking of following it up. I think that's really important for a site like this one. Oh, and the writing is tight and clear. Write more!

really?! oh that makes me feel so happy. thank you very much for the feedback. I have been lurking around the site for the past hour, to see if anyone would read it. haha.

I think it was okay, the writing was really good. You left it open for anyone to pick it up and write on it, and that is really good

I agree, its okay not great, but I am hoping to put up some better stuff soon, when I brainstorm it haha. I thank you for the compliment, anytime someone says my writing is good, or decent, I am all smiles.

Ten months ago I missed this...;o(. Now that I know you're still here, I'll read the rest of your work, too.

I really like this storyline. You've done a very good job of building your characters and your descriptive narrative's are excellent. One place lost me: "This is why just as I reluctantly tore open my eyes, I watched as his rolled into the back of his head, and he toppled to the ground." What rolled into the back of his head? What happened?

Overall you should spend more time proofreading. There are several glaring grammatical errors and spelling mistakes.

I am not a grammar nazi by any means. For me, it's the story that matters most and this is a very good story!