Discussion of "JEMS !^" by aptriplett

so, what are we looking forward to now? His transfere? I find it a little odd that in "future times" that old fashioned alarm clocks and manilla folders are still being used. Not sure what to think about the perceived relationship with Natasha. And why is a doctor running around the hospital with cotton balls when robots exist for delivering messages?

This is a story that I wrote when I was 15. At the time I favored more of a contrasting between the serious and funny, the realistic and imaginative, modern and old. I left it as it was since it is more of a time-piece of where I was at the time for me then something I planned to finish. I would love to see someelse expand off it, hopefully w a ltl better writting, lol. Also, I would really appreciate and respect your thoughts on my poem, also written when I was younger.

This is an odd place to put this, but ApTriplett, I just read your comments to various stories (under your "profile," so I've no context to what stories you're referring -- which is even better), and they are hilarious.

I would suggest collecting them all and posting those as a latter day "Deep Thoughts" ...

... Seriously!

I think my favorite is something about a king pop and droppin' it like a ninja.

Change the name to Snoozfest. :)

This is in need of a great deal of editing. Persephonie, you seem quite educated on such things. I would appreciate any additional comments you would have on how to better this story. Its only the second draft, a few dozen away from publication, as you can see.