The story so far:
I am a tough person. My strength comes from within and I do not need anyone resorting to flattery in order to make me feel better. I do not believe in depression, ADHD and all the rest of that neurotic granma crap. I have my own values to which I adhere ; the rest is optional . I am also very tolerant but you would not perceive me as such if you met me down the road at a local bar. Leave me be and I will leave you be. Even now, with this abomination growing in my head. CEO’s are supposed to live in the real world where there is no time for contemplation on a mountain top. But, you know what ? To hell with it. I have decided to give it a shot…my wife Karen, my kids, everyone…I do love them and I do not want them to suffer. I want them to be happy. They cannot see me like this, a person incapable of controlling his moves. I have read about Charles Whitman and I know what a brain tumor can do. I must isolate myself from others – not out of my egotism but out of love. I have left a note for my wife explaining the situation. I do hope she will understand after reading this :
Charles Joseph Whitman (June 24, 1941 – August 1, 1966) was a student at the University of Texas at Austin who killed 14 people and wounded 31 others as part of a shooting rampage from the observation deck of the University's 32-story administrative building on August 1, 1966. He did this shortly after murdering his wife and mother. He was eventually shot and killed by Austin police.
I am afraid of losing control. I cannot allow it. I am an expert marksman, I know how to handle myself in hand-to-hand combat. Hell, I am a soldier, I have seen human depravity around the world – in Somalia, in Iraq, in Serbia. I can only speculate what might happen when, and not if, my inner barrier begins to crack, eventually shattering into pieces, leaving me at the mercy of my primordial whim.
Yes. I will be like Ted Kaczynski.