Discussion of "In a Nuts Hell ch. 2 (with spelling corrections)" by Psycho1_77

Mystery: intriguing.
Suspense: nervewracking.
Character: believable.

I enjoy the storyline. My objection is the inner monologue. It's too on the money, beyond what sounds natural. Have you ever said the following words, even to yourself:

"Hell, my imagination must be in overdrive."
"I really don't think Darrion will mind if I help myself just this once."
"When I wake from this nightmare I'm gonna give up the drink for good, that's for damn sure."

They pulled me from the story, which I otherwise really enjoyed.

In the interest of transparency, I voted for your story and I gave it a 4.

I also voted for your other chapter 2 and I gave it a 1. I know you're not trying to have multiple entries of the same chapter, and I suspect you prefer the version with spelling corrections. I did the same thing (voted mine a 1) for a chapter of mine I posted twice (reposted for story structure).

-- Nash

I'm glad that you are enjoying this story so far. This was one of those ideas that came from nowhere in a flash and actually unfolded in my mind as I wrote it. The original idea was really just about the dog.

also... thank you for te constructive criticism...

I really like this story for all the reasons that nashvillebecker mentioned and I have to agree that Chris' inner monologue is a little contrived. But, this chapter was better than the first and I hope you continue. I gave this one a 4, too.

I plan to continue this until the idea dries up... chapter 3 is actually attached to the other ch 2, so you'll have to navigate there to read it.

Beautiful horror. We don’t know what’s happening, but it continues to happen. The dog appears, then disappears…yet this time takes a few fingers with him. So, it’s not just in his imagination…Awesome!
The edge of my seat is getting a real workout here!

You have great descriptions, it's really easy to picture everything as it happens which makes this story even more exciting.
On to chapter 3!

What??? What exactly does that mean?

awesome