I will dye my hair purple,

put a hole through my nose,

and do whatever it takes to be popular.

Treat people like crap.

Is that where it's at?

What's the point of living if you're not popular?

Gotta brush up on all the right lines and all the slick moves.

That's what will get me my ticket so I can set foot on that magical land.

It just seems like a surreal place, doesn't it?

I look at it from afar, and it is so beautiful in a not-of-this-world way.

It's a fantasy land that exists right here on earth.

It just doesn't get any better than that.

But once I get there,

will I be adored today but forgotten tomorrow,

after someone else comes along with hipper lines and cooler moves?

Then they will be popular.

Then what will I be?

Miss Popular of whatever month from the year two thousand whatever?

Is that how I will be remembered?

Does it matter?

At least I will be on top for one glorious moment.

Sure, moments are only fleeting bits of time,

but it will surely feel wild and orgasmic while it lasts.

I'm going to die some day.

Why not go out knowing I was once popular?

Tomorrow I may be yesterday's news,

but I will worry about tomorrow when it comes.

And when it does?

Will anyone like me anymore?

When everyone looks at me, what will they see?

Guess I'll have to walk through the door of popularity and find out for myself.

Hey, what's wrong with being popular?

Maybe nothing.

Maybe a lot.

I'll just have to enter that door at my own risk.