I only wish I had more respect for myself

than to put my body up for grabs and put the rest of me on a shelf.

The most valuable part of me is hidden away.

I lie to myself and say I'll take it out some other day,

but the truth is that I doubt whether it's there at all.

That's how my addiction to sex became my downfall.

I sit at a bar, smile, and show a little leg.

Getting sex is a snap for a woman. She never has to beg.

It's a turn-on to know that I have all that delicious power

to seduce a guy off a bar stool and into my shower.

Winning his heart is a trickier thing.

It takes a lot more work, and sometimes pain is all it brings.

I suppose that's what led me down this X-rated road.

How do I get off it? Is there a secret code?

A man walks into the room, and I just can't turn my eyes away.

Doesn't matter that he's a total stranger who might lead me astray.

As long as the encounter ends with mutual satisfaction,

then my body tingles with an afterglow after getting some action.

If it's a quickie, that's all the better. It makes the act feel hotter,

even though he'll boast about the girl he met and how easily he got her.

I meet someone else in the elevator on the ride back up to my place,

and my physical urges take over again. I'm such a damn disgrace.

What am I supposed to do? Imprison myself in my room?

My sexual desires are shoving my heart and soul into a tomb.

This has got to stop. I don't recognize myself anymore.

It's time to seek professional help and put an end to this war

between my body and my spirit. I want to be the person I used to be.

I want to look at myself in the mirror and like the woman who I see.