I like this: you're taking the PETA position that all use of animals is wrong and extrapolating it to a worldwide disaster. It's basically an animal rights dystopia. I think it's successful as is, although I would prefer to start out with the introduction of your characters - themselves representations of the ramifications of the beef ban - rather than getting a chunk of narration that explains everything first. Weave the understanding of the world in with the story - right now it's a little bit "A long time ago in a galaxy far far away".

I like the concept, and it's not a bad set-up at all. I like that you get right to the encounter between Emilio and the trees.

But a lot of the conversation between Emilio and the Trees in confusing. What is a third child? What is a fifth child? It doesn't seem like they are talking about literal children, but something else.

I don't like that Emilio accepts his gift so fast. There's no conflict there. You write: "He finally understood why the trees considered this a gift, and why no tree-talker ever regretted having that third child" but there is no finally - a light suffuses him and he gets it - there is no struggle or resistance.

The idea of this story is awesome, but it could be better. I like the use of plain language (this stuff is totally ordinary to these people) but you have some awkward wordings and tense issues.

For Example

*The door lay open revealing the livestock, hay, and hanging bodies; everything was neatly in order from years of experience." "from years of experience" doesn't fit here - it's referring to something that's not in this sentence, namely, Bruce or whoever put the bodies in the barn.
*Bright afternoon sunlight beamed through the window giving the man ample vision to work* vision is the wrong word here.

But I think the thing that would really improve this story would be to make it a little more active. Every time we're introduced to something creepy, it's laying or sitting. If the goal is shock (and shock humor) you might be better off hiding the punchline, so to speak, a little bit longer. For example, when Isabelle goes to the barn, the bodies are just there. If instead, she sees Bruce making his coat first, we have an in - a reason to see them (if this were a movie, you'd have the girl walk to Bruce, Bruce is making the coat, pan up to bodies, music cue). Likewise with the body that's on the ground becoming a pinata. Instead of just writing that a body lay there, show us the active part first (the man that looks like Bruce stuffing the body).

If you were going to keep going with this, I would agree with that one comment about how you'd need more character development. Right now, there's not much to these people as people: they are just archetypes that you're playing with. If this is a one off humor piece, I think that's fine.

I think I got confused there for a moment - the fell/fallen is the wrong tense, the had stretched is the right tense.

Thanks for commenting on my story, by the way.

I think this is a good start, but it needs some work.

Your third sentence here: "I began to notice a blood trail and my mouth began to water as the delicious scent filled my nostrils" needs some work. What is "a blood trail"? Is he smelling a wounded person? Or just a human being in general? I also don't like "began to notice" - it's very passive, and it calls into question why he is running through the forest in the first place. I think you'd be better off having him already running, already salivating, the scent trail of his human prey filling his nostrils, his blood lust so strong he can almost feel his intended victim's pulse/taste his blood/etc. Then, when Ava has killed him, we feel his frustration.

The intro of Ava: some really bizarre word/phrase choices. "the girl of red hair"? "Her red hair was every bit of scarlet". Re-word this stuff, because it doesn't make sense.

Likewise with "The amount of tease in her voice was evident" - was it? I don't know how much tease was in her voice. To the reader, it's not evident. Instead of telling us this, show us Ash's reaction to being teased.

"It was a cornered smile that said I made you" - another awkward wording. Is Ava Ash's maker/sire/the chick who vamped him? This isn't clear, and that sort of power isn't conveyed by the word "corned" which would seem to indicate as lack of choice, or even submission.

Decent blood trade stuff (personally, I'd go for sexier, less like downing an energy drink - stuff like "drawing blood instantly" is redundant where it could be hot - he is basically kiss-biting her face after all). Nice ending.

You've got a great set-up here with the kid who is watching his father kill people.
Your narrator is very detached: either he is remembering these events much, much later or he's a sociopath himself. At some point, the narrator tells us that he is "still afraid" but the text does little to indicate that. It's hard to follow the story because of all the jumping around in time and tense, but the kid seems to be more interested in than scared by his father's actions. This story would be a lot better if it was more linear, and if we as the reader discovered along with your protagonist what was going on - let us get in there with him and experience this horror, and then let us wrestle along with him as he decides what to do about it - should he leave? should he go the police? etc. Right now, he just kind of leaves, because he's figured it's about time.

You've got some great descriptions of physical things though: the blood dripping on the hay, the stain under his father's fingernails, etc.

I think this could benefit from some tighter pacing - this is a horror short, but it takes us until the very end of the chapter to get that.
We're first treated to a lot of backstory that seems mostly extraneous. Do you see the dead grandmother being important later on? Is the fact the she used to be a mortgage broker crucial? The way the story is now, the narrator simply informs us of these facts, languidly. I get that you want to set up the conflict between the family in the woods and their extended family, but it's always better to show conflict (or anything) than inform us of it. Rather than first discussing the fact that her family hates them, and then having the family show up, bring the relatives to the woods first, then let us *feel* the tension. Horror is all about tension.
Likewise, the Skin Hounds story that she tells to the kids is very "Tell, Not Show": first, we get a long backstory followed by a tiny, not very vivid, description of the Skin Hounds. "And then the legend of the skin hounds was born" It's good that the Skin Hound couple's situation parallels that of the protagonist and her family, but it needs to be more eerie, less historical lesson.

gah. I hate that this comes out as a big lump. I even put html tags in it to break it up. Fail.

I'm trying to read the top entries to the contest.

You've done a great job of setting the scene here: I'm drawn in to this vivid (if depressing) place that Amanda inhabits. At this point, it seems most like a character study, but we'll just have to see where you take it. I would like to get a better idea of what Amanda feels (rather than just what she knows) about her situation (you go into it once - when she spreads out on the bed and decides she would give her own daughter her own bed).

Here are some nitpicky comments. I haven't read through all your comments (did notice the Persephonie vs third person omniscient war - huh?) so I'm sorry if this is all repeats:

*food money stamps* is an awkward wording, IMO. It sounds like you're trying to get around using the phrase "food stamps", possibly out of a concern than Amanda wouldn't know their proper name. If this story is set in the present, food stamps are actually a card (like a credit card). I would go with either "food money" or "food stamps".

*drunk alone and fell asleep* should be "fallen".

*She had stretched out in the middle of the bed* should be "she stretched" since it is in the story's present.

"in their worn shabby condition" I would go with one of these words instead of both since they mean basically the same thing (and "despite" rather than "in")

Thanks for your comments (and telling me how you voted).

The one thing I can clear up easily for you is the "taste of the trucker" issue - the rest of that line is "she'd sucked off to get a ride". She's not referring to blood (which is a taste she likes) but to oral sex.