Discussion of "He Knows Things" by EllyBee

What a sweet and very tense little story! I'm so accustomed to reading stories on SM where only bad things happen that this one was a pleasant surprise. It's spelled caul though, in case anyone needs to look it up. I gave you a 5:)

I thought this was a feel good story, and it made me smile.
Well Written!

Nicely done. A refreshing change from some of the other stuff out there.

Very Nice! Hope you plan to continue this story.

LOL...well, I guess everyone doesn't know about caul's and birth at midnight. This is not going to be a feel good story! But, it certainly starts out that way and the writing is great, in particular the narratives about giving birth. Not that I have...lol...but, I'm a proud father of five and I've been there all five times.

Th simplicity of the characters leads nicley into the the "legend" you portray. I, myself, know nothing of it, but it's interesting....2nd son, born at midnight...maybe an anti-christ figure? Who know? But the options seem limitless. Nicely done!

I enjoyed this. Different and original.

The tension was great!

Seemed like it took a little long to get to the point. I dion't know that I needed ALL of that info just to find out the kid is gonna be special. Interesting premise though.

I gave this considerable thought, and while the storyline is endearing and nicely done… I’m afraid it’s not for me.

You definitely have a talent for story telling and the pacing clips right along. One thing I was hoping for was that something would happen that I wasn't predicting (like it wouldn't be a boy, or that it really didn't have a face!) Would like to see a little more intrigue...

Your writing style is clear and charming. I especially liked "This wasn't her first rodeo"--this sentence helps us realize that we're in the country and dealing with country folk.

However, I must admit that I thought the country dialect was over the top. I appreciate the fact that you're trying to stay true to the region your characters live in, but I couldn't help but be distracted by the dialogue throughout the chapter. It was hard for me to focus on the actual story and what was going to happen with the characters sounding slightly cartoonish and exaggerated.

The third to last paragraph threw me off. "She knew about cawls and she knew what it meant when your second son was born at midnight"--what does it mean? This is a lost opportunity for you to start some of the mystery in the story.

I have to say that while I enjoy your writing style, I don't think this story is as mashable as some of the others.

Overall, good effort! Keep it up.

Thank you all so much for your comments. This is a story I pulled out of my "box". I am glad it's been so warmly received. I know it's a little long on background but, it kind of explains why the story develops the way it does. I so appreciate all the feedback. I look forward to hearing what you think about the rest of it.

writerwannabe, you guessed it! This was not written as a "feel good story". There is a sicko on the loose and Thad is his true victim. I hope you keep reading. It's getting juicy!