This is a lovely story. The details are so vivid; the church, the bus ride, the food and drink, the beach, etc. The personalities are beautifully conveyed, including the mystery woman, who has a distinct presence with very little dialogue. The blend of sentiment and melancholy create a softness that pervades the story from start to finish. The scene on the beach is tastefully rendered and extremely hot! You are a good story-teller. I call it a solid 4.

Exactly. I didn't have any trouble with the revised frame of mind at the end. It fit perfectly, and is in fact more realistic than the alternative.

rico, it is subtle but I took it as one of those scam emails from Africa where if you do what they say they empty out your bank account, and this led his father to kill himself, so he is on a quest to find the sender and take revenge.

Thank you! I am inspired and have some new ideas thanks to you. I'll let you know if I get around to adding to it.

One of my favorite SM writers does it again. Wonderfully dark and sinister. I was glad to see you bring in the old serial killer story and tie that in. I was struggling with how to reconcile that. The recipe got me. I already had a sense of what the main ingredient would be before the list, but "pork" in quotes got me. I laughed out loud. I hope you don't mind if I hold to that as my favorite part. It just tickled me, I guess, whatever that says about me. Please check out my latest contributions, I even did another installment on the long neglected 30 days project. Very mashable leave. Maybe I'll mash it, sort of up my alley. Glad to see you active here. Keep blowing minds, see ya 'round.

Nice one. Wonderfully horrible and vivid! I was at first jarred by the character's anger, as nothing of the sort had been revealed earlier, but I was able to reconcile that as the story progressed. Those with the most to hide reveal the least of themselves to the public, and this was the first look inside the character's head.

I do have a slight problem with being able to hide a car or sneak into other people's homes undetected in a small town. People don't miss much in tight-nit communities like you have portrayed here. Word of her car outside his house and the prolonged visit would have spread everywhere in a matter of hours, especially considering the potentially scandalous possibility of an affair and the (already) piqued curiosity of the townspeople. Alas, I can overlook that, because the writing is pretty much flawless.

Perfect. Intricate detail, hints of an overarching plot without revealing too much. Wonderful character development and sense of place. As usual, you have deliver the goods. Bravo!

I love it. Excellent setup and tease with a wonderful economy of words. A solid 4 in my opinion.

I came along and made another installment on Brookstone.

Rico gives solid advice. This is the smoothest chapter yet. Boy, that mother of hers is unbelievably flaky, but it is consistent with what you have presented of her so far. I hope you keep working on this one because I want to keep reading. You have set up a very uncomfortable situation and it will be fun to see where you take it. Keep up the good work!