Discussion of "May 13, 2008" by Acee_Andrade
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theblackhand 8 months ago
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This is good. You kept the storyline. I was not planning on a birthday for him but it does give the story an added twist. Work on proofreading your work to correct spelling mistakes. The only thing I ask of you if you add other chpts is to keep the story serious and not add any unneeded bulls-t. I am satisfied with your addition to this story. |
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Acee_Andrade 7 months, 1 week ago
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Much obliged. I found your start to be filled with wonderful possibilities. |
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HuntsFamousWolf 7 months ago
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5 thats all i have to say, nice description good emotion.... |
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Acee_Andrade 7 months ago
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that's word, hunts. I appreciate that. |
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writerwannabe 7 months ago
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Super job! I think you followed the start chapter perfectly and gave the character build a few more building blocks. I especially liked this sentence: "I'm beginning to think that they know about me, the urges, the red sprays I envision as they talk at me. Yes, at me. They talk as if I'm some Silly Putty man." Very visual, very good. 5 points. |
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Acee_Andrade 6 months, 4 weeks ago
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That's word, Thanks!! |
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